Musing

JOURNEY TO BECOMING A GRAND DAD

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Just got back from lunch with my oldest daughter, son-in-law, and my new 12 year old adopted grandson. Once a month I have lunch with my oldest daughter but it has been a few months since the last time as she was getting her new son settled in and everyone growing adjusted to each other. Me, I am still not quite use to the fact that I am a Granddad,  going to need more time and more exposure to A.J. It seems women have it somewhat easier to adapt to these situation, might have something to do with the maternal instinct. My Ex who is AJs’ Grandma has accepted him quite readily into her heart and as far as she is concerned he is her grandson. Me, well let us just say that I am not as acceptable. I need time to adjust. I know that eventually I will come around but it has to be at my speed. I have never been one for making a lot of friends or letting just anyone into my life. Fact is when I was married most of our friends were my ex-wife’s’ not mine. She always complained about that saying if she didn’t make friends or acquaintances we would never have had any at all. Well we would have had friends just not as many and not as quickly as she would have liked. I am not anti-social, I like people I’m  just choosy. Before I forget, about the picture up top , if I were ever to end up looking like that old guy I would hope someone in my family would have the decency to shoot me.

 

The first time I met my grandson was on Xmas day 2012 when I went to dinner at my Daughters. . I was tackled by this young man shouting Grand Dad and hugging me. Now I am not a demonstrative person so this took me by complete surprise. Didn’t know what to do at first so I hugged him back and say “Hello Anthony”. Hey I didn’t know what else to do. It’s weird after all these years having a youngster around. Both my girls by the time they were 18 were out of the house living their own lives so I’m not use to young people. Like I said I think women have an easier time adjusting to these situations than most men do. Don’t get me wrong, I couldn’t be happier for my Daughter as she has always wanted a family but to wake up one morning and BAM instant 12 year old you have to admire her and her husband.  Thirty-six years ago my ex talked about adopting a Vietnamese orphan and I have to admit I went along but it was hard. You see, a few years before this I had been fighting the Vietnamese for almost 2 years. Just as I was sort of warming up to the idea it all fell through. Can’t remember why, and I must admit there was a little twinge of relief. Maybe I should feel guilty about this but I don’t. I don’t think I’m a horrible person because of it nor that I was racist just it was a big change and I wasn’t really ready for that. About 2 years after this our youngest daughter was born and I was back on top of cloud nine. I had my 2 daughter. Always been partial to having daughters even though a son would have been nice.  

To get back to the present I know that as I get to know AJ better I will end up loving him a great deal. Just need time. A cousin of mine adopted a young boy quite awhile back and he has grown into a fine young man and as far as I’m concerned I have to remind myself he is adopted. Just don’t think of D. in that way.

Here I am at 70 years and now a Grand Dad, which by the way I have always wanted to be. Just thought it would have occurred earlier and the normal way and given me at least 9 months to adapt. Well with the warm weather coming and my scooter soon to be back on the road I guess I will get to know AJ a lot better. He has already asked me to take him for a ride which I will do but only with his Mom and Dads’ permission.. Betcha by summers’ end him and I will be the best of buddies. Hey I’m not a miserable old stick in the mud who can’t adjust. Just need that most precious of all things time. 

                                                                                                                                

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